I know, I know,  you f-tarded bastards, yes I know I can be so mean, or seem like I’m being mean, or like I’m being racist, or…fill in yer negative stereotype.

Look all you cats n kitten I’m the Dysfunctional Unit fer a reason, that doesn’t excuse what I do, but it may explain why you may misunderstand what I am trying to say….

No, really, I think you (many of you) jes do that on purpose…

Here, as an example, is a poem I once wrote n performed occasionally in the coffee houses in the So Cal area…

I wrote this poem about a neighbor that’s why it’s called…


Why My Neighbor Kept a Dog

He kept a dog

‘Cause he wanted a woman

But the dog didn’t complain when he beat it

He didn’t have to give it money to go to the mall or to get it’s hair done

He didn’t have to listen to it complain about his lifestyle choices

And when he left the house

The dog followed three steps behind

Like he believed a good bitch should

And that’s why he kept a dog

I've heard it's best to start their traning early.

I’ve heard it’s best to start their training early.


Okay so whenever I read that poem I was invariably accosted by audience members fer being a sexist….fer suggesting women should be beaten…wha…wha…what ?!?

It was about my nieghbor!

It was one of my first experiences with pc’run a’mokness

So like, when I wrote the post re:Putin n Obama I of course never realized that readers would think I was racist.

I did portray Putin as a arrogant dangerous racist, Obama as an arrogant child/man (and somewhat racist)…(as to the pictures n size of text hopefully that’s fixed-ish)…

But again, me bein a racist, meaning I personally am judging people solely by their skin color.

Sorry not my thing.

I look at what people do and how they behave, what they say and write, and the differences between the two.

Obama in a sea of white 4

Good Racism in action.

Ex: Like white American suburban liberals who were happy to vote for Obama to show that America had moved beyond all that, to prove we were no longer a racist nation, or certainly they themselves were no longer racists.

I have news fer ya, hate to break it to ya…but if you voted fer President  Obama because he was black yer a racist.

You acted based solely on the color of his skin.

Racism. Yea you say, “but it was good racism.

Oh wait, I know, I know ya support his policies n pogroms…whoops Freudian…programs.

Name one…

Health Care, Lowell,  hows that been workin’ out fer ya?

How ’bout the economy?

How ’bout how much it suddenly costs to buy groceries, fill the tank…oh and so on.

I know, I know many of you didn’t really read up on Mr. Obama prior to votin fer him, ya jes listened to the TV news…well really the news is pretty boring, but ya did n do watch John Stewart and Jimmy Fallon.

Late Nite Laughs!

Late Nite Laughs!

Anyway if ya did any homework at all there was plenty to suggest to find. Mr. Obama was not shy about his views regarding America’s wealth n privilage (meaning white America) and told us all ahead of time he believed some of these things needed to happen.

That is because then student and then Senator Obama fully believed two important principles (along with many others, even on the so called conservative side).

1 That white Euro-American success and power came at the expense of the third world nations and peoples, and the field should be leveled utilizing western resources to fuel a resurgence in wealth and transferring of resources  back to the “victim” nations.

2 Big Government can & should be the tool used to level the playing field between rich and poor (peoples and nations both).

Well okay that’s a whole ‘nother can of beans as they say.


No matter what you think, I don’t like our President because I don’t agree with what he professes to believe in.

Don’t like his tendency to support the idea that the Government is a balm to soothe all societies ills…

I don’t think he really believes that it can.

He does wants us to believe it can.

I used to believe those things, used to be a super lefty, think  I made that clear enough…

I jes don’t anymore based on all available evidence and data.

Government  isn’t there to be the Big Mommy n Daddy of us all, nor is it here to be the arbiter of healthy living, nor make people like each other…

Thanks Mommy!

Thanks Mommy!

Not only is in not supposed to be doing these things, it can’t.

No matter how much it promises, no matter how much it takes from one group to give to another, no matter how much it obfuscates and finger points (both damn sides) the (fed) Gov cannot right the wrongs of the past.

It cannot guarantee safety n happiness fer all.

Cannot guarantee fairness…and should be ashamed fer leading people to think it can.

One the few things that the Federal Government is suppose to do…A#1, top o my list anyway, is to protect our country from people, organizations, or other countries that mean to do harm to the ol’ US of A.

Harm not jes to our people, our land or things, but our interests as well, the economic interests of the citizens, of our pretty “good” country…

This is why I switched parties in the 2000. Other logic added into it but this was the key factor.

One of the politial parties was fer American interest, and one was fer the worlds.

Jes some other breaking news fer ya, people in other parts of the world covet what Americans have.

They believe as our President does(see above…)and as so many liberal University/College Professors have been teaching fer years now (that’s why so many good hard working kind n thoughtfully green citizens of America also believe this and support the idea*)that our Country’s dominance is due solely to nefarious criminal activities on America’s part and not due to the hard work and sacrifice of generations of it’s people.


Tenured Professor Bilde,        U of AH

So, many people in other countries, as well as a lot of people in this one, feel that the taking of what America has & what Americans have achieved would be more akin to a comeuppance than theft…

And jes a question fer those supporters of this philosophy, what did you think this balancing was going to feel like?*

The dollar losing it’s buying power…how is that goin fer ya?

And as to the various parts of the third world gaining world “player”status ain’t never gonna happen …in yer dreams.

I mean really. did that sound like it was gonna work.

The 3rd world is gonna stay overwhelmingly poor.

Some other powerful country will fill the vacuum when we abandon the post…n I doubt it will be Russia, seriously, though Putin’s makin his move early fer his sizable chunk of the “2nd” world.

If I was layin’ money I’d say China has better odds.

And with America n Americans out of the picture who’s gonna give a flyin f about the 3rd world then…

Of course I’m way off topic…’cause the point is all this…this cultural shifting and it’s full o’ the ol’ crap-ola cheerleaders are laughable at best and the fact that I find myself being the voice of patriotic reason hilarious.

So my posts are always funny to me and wait…what?

Yea full of crap you heard me!

What happens when the fad dies n black goes back to bein the new black?

What happens when the fad dies n black goes back to bein the new black?

I…look if you go around callin’ yerself Green ’cause ya think about the environment a lot and vote democrat, and maybe ya’  changed all the lite bulbs (ha! go look up the new lite bulb fer yerself) in yer four bedroom house…

What’s the real gas mileage on yer new eco-friendly SUV (or compact fer that matter)?

Okay you support alternative energies, how much do you utilize during yer average day to help accomplish yer average day?

Recycling: The Green Movement's Indulgences

Recycling: The Green Movement’s Indulgences.

Oh n of course recyclin, recyclin and buyin, buyin n recyclin…Lowell, we certainly ain’t slowin down in our consumer tendencies…

E-garbage, the new future's dirty little secret.

E-garbage, the tech livin future’s dirty little secret.

How many new, unrecyclable, untrashable, electronic gadgets have you n yer family bought in the past year?

How many have you thrown away?

How much is in yer garage? Can ya still fit the new Wrangler in there?

How many closets do you have that could rival Fibber McGee’s?

Do I have to ask more rhetorical questions?

sun chips

Proof of American consumer’s rhetorical commitments n fickle fads finicky foibles.

Not too long ago one of my favorite brand of chips came out with a new bio-degradable bag…the new bag was quickly scrapped and they were forced to return to the old fashioned ungreen bags.

What was the problem, the big consumer complaint you may wonder?

The bags were noisier. That was it…it bothered consumers that the bags made more noise, and these are the “healthy/green crowd” chips.

Oh…oh…I’m sorry! Oh…hold on!..Oh it is to laugh.

I tell ya what if yer living on a self sustaining farm in a remote part of the country you can talk to me about being green.

Otherwise yer full o the ol’ crap-ola.

Crowning themselves Champion

Winner & Still Champeen!

If you go around sayin it’s a proven fact that women can take more pain than men yer full o the ol crap-ola…

I’m not sayin they can’t, or that they can…

I’m sayin it hasn’t been scientifically proven despite all the news reports that feature studies that say they have “possibly maybe” done just that.

Science is evolving.

Science is evolving.

Even, dare I say it…evolution is only a theory…that’s why it’s called the theory of evolution.

I’m not sayin we didn’t evolve. Hear (or read anyway) what I’m sayin…(though I do believe of course in a mix of both science n God)…

I’m jes sayin ya can’t go around sayin evolution’s a proven fact & there is no God and that people who believe, have faith in a God are stupid, then also talk about human beings innate goodness and talking about karma…wellll…I guess you can but…

I’m sayin if yer claimin to be somethin be it.

If ya say yer tolerant of all view points, ya’ can’t be a pussy when ya hear one ya’ don’t like, other wise yer full of…okay you get it…

Now look how long it’s taken jes to get through that b.s.

But see again I find it hilarious to openly challenge so many and have none willing to respond…that’s funny isn’t it?

I know there are a lot of liberals on WP.

Are you a white middle upper middle income American with a family, house, kids, possibly in college, who having voted fer Obama, views themselves as a good n green modern American liberal with health care n justice fer all (the oppressed)?

I chuckle in the face of yer hypocrisy and l & the fab o l brothers at yer lack of ba…

…sic support of yer own arguments…

And again that’s funny, at least to this Unit.


Great Scott America

March 4, 2014

Okay so hey cats n kittens…though I should get a new post out in a day or two…jes thought, since we’re so close to tax time I’d re-post this from last year.
Of course I don’t expect that anyone who read this avoided payin taxes this year.
Also I’m pretty sure most won’t even remember these issues and/or that the IRS is still outta control…
After all the Oscars were jes on and didn’t “The Voice” start up again. Who’s got time to worry bout how the country’s bein run.


Well okay..well..I mean F ‘n A!

I’ve written a lot about the state of our Federal Government, I mean probably only  a little less than I have written about how women are ruining America…

Wait…I’m sorry what?

Look I don’t have time to go back every time and discuss every crazy thing I have ever said…go back here and look it up…today I got bigger fish on my mind…today I’m kind’a pissed off…

Look so by now if you are paying any attention at all you know that the General Services Administration or GSA just spent a whopping $8000,000 (+) on planning and vacation(s) fer 300 employee’s.

That’s the easy breezy cover girl version tryin to review all the different facets, facts in this case, well in the long run it just made me too pissed off to continue.

And then of course my little dog starts spinning and I…

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Slavery, Schlmavery

November 9, 2013

Hey all you Dysu fans, heres the aforementioned follow up post to “Whiggers”
Please don’t hesitate to lemme know how my brilliant diatribe helped ya see a new truth…
Or yea vice versa.


Okay now where the hell was I…Oh yea I was telling you all  to stop whining about slavery.

Here’s the ugly truth about slavery.

At one point in human history everybody was making slaves out of the people they conquered.

Every era, every race, culture, countries, city states, tribes took slaves.

It was the way things were done.

Am I saying it was right?

Am I condoning slavery?

Jumped up  Jesus on a pogo stick NO! The ol’ Dysu, that’s me cats & kittens just wants to talk about truth.

Point one: Bad things happen.

But sometimes good  results from this or these “bad thing(s)”.

Take slavery for example.

If your are the direct descendant of an individual taken from Africa against their will and brought to this country for the purpose of slavery well then your lucky because that means you were born in America instead…

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No Desires too Extreme

October 25, 2013

Last of a re-blogged three part’er. In celebration of my two year WP anniversary.
I will continue to re-post older blogs interspersed among my latest ramblings. Jes ’cause I want to 🙂
If ya like this check out my other blog (more fer fun)
or even
Anyway, don’t ferget to leave a comment and thanks fer stopping by.


Look it’s not their fault Cats & Kittens and here the Ol’ Dysu means women, the female. And to better help facilitate this discussion andthe ol dysu include as many readers as I can lets set the Bible aside for a sec and take a look from an scientific, empirical dare I even say evolutionary stand point.

I’m Mr. Protoman Jones, got me a little Mrs Protoman. We live on the grass lands. Life’s pretty good.

We live in a small group, hunting and gathering. All the other Protomen think like I do, things are pretty good. But the Mrs is always complaining, lil Jr got eaten by a big cat, when it rains her hair gets wet, the fire goes out and everything gets muddy.

Mrs P has noticed on those far off hills, a set of holes in the rock cliff. Mrs P thinks they would make a better home…

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When you wish upon a dream

October 25, 2013

And so here’s part 2 Cats & Kittens. Enjoy. Watch fer new upcoming post on “Zombies, Mutants, & the Coming Apocalypse”. Don’t ferget to leave a comment below.


See the thing is that “the Dysu” is crazy. That’s why I say the things I do. However, crazy or not, I mean what I say.the ol dysu

Also I believe what I say is true (or I wouldn’t have said it) and can back it up with plenty of evidence; which once presented will cause all women in America to stop. Just stop.

Oh that’s funny. I just had to put that in there.

No wait I have a better one. What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Okay well ya’ heard that one already.

Well the punchline fits here so…No I don’t advocate violence against women; at least not undeserved violence, a useful beating now and then to keep them in line…

No, now I’m just being hilariously hyperbolic, or hilariobolic.

I do not support men who physically assault the weaker sex.

No real man does and…

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Well today I got a message sayin’ it was my two year anniversary on WP but I didn’t have my next post ready so I thought I’d go back n share an old post jes fer fun. I think it might have three parts all together so I’ll try to post them all.
I love Daniel’s comment, notice I didn’t dissuade him from the idea that this is satire…
That’s right, jes harmless satire.
No matter ya think I’m right on or a sexist caveman leave a comment ’cause it’s way more fun that way!


As I watch the CBS early show this morning, I find myself tracking the amount of health issues, either through commercials or actual the ol dysu“news” stories that I am forced to watch in a one hour period.

Is any one else but me stunned that the first three hours of an average (woman’s) morning is spent in a country wide panic attack about smokin, breast cancer, COPD, ADD, ADHD, Dry eye syndrome, dry eye m-f-ing syndrome. Dear Lord will it never end.

Listen ladies, here’s what I have to say to you…don’t you worry your pretty little heads about that.

If ya don’t like that one how ’bout this one…Woman Shut Up!

The most valuable things that men gave up over the last half a century have been those two comments.

Women, ladies, chicks, doll faces, sweetie buns, here’s the deal. Life is dangerous and imperfect and you cannot pass enough…

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Well goodness gracious Cats & Kittens, I mean I’ve posted some poorly edited posts but yesterday’s takes the kace, akec, cake!

I mean I wish I had an excuse.  I jes don’t. I didn’t see (some freakin how) all the mistakes. I’d like to say it was an early draft and that this is a later auto save but that’d be an untruth.

And yea I realize it’s sometimes hard to tell with me ’cause I make up words and write in such a rambling manner but…

I mean it’s bad when I read it and even I can’t decipher what my point was.

Oh it is to laugh.

Okay so anyway here ya go, that is if yer still interested. A cleaner, clearer, version of 1, 2, 3, 4 I Declare a Dumb War

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Next up Obamachol!

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