Fun with Facts

April 22, 2012

And so Cats & Kittens here we go…I mean I promised I would revisit this subject…I think it’s important to what I am tryin to say overall…I don’t wanna rehash everything…oh n as always it’s me the Dysu.

I mean it might behoove you, if yer really interested in discussing this subject honestly, to understand that the main purpose of this blog is to pass on this stuff I have come to believe, (that is in direct contrast to modern popular culture) to my own kids…

So if this post is to help clarify, solidify things I have already said you may, (especially if ya think I’m full of the ol crapola) want to go back and read some of these earlier pieces…

I am going to bold all (I feel) my real important points just in case you want to skim to get the general idea, that way you don’t have to read all the long boring parts kids…

I feel it may be also equally important to assist you, here in the beginning, to understand what I am not tryin to say…

I am not sayin women are inferior to men (I’ve said numerous times just the opposite).

Or am I claiming anything other than what I am actually saying.

Though, and am quite aware that, I have a tendency to ramble off the beaten path, I do try to choose my steps(words)on this path carefully, and try to eventually end up where I meant to go, despite the weird often circuitous and oft times made up route I take to arrive at the destination.

Wow that probably didn’t help at all…how bout this

I am going to speak in generalizations* about a specific issue

Though I use hyperbole and (hopefully) humor I am serious and believe what I say.

I know you probably don’t, that’s why I am sayin it…

And I’m not just pullin this out my own a*^, there is lots of evidence, facts to support my claims.

Okay well if I can think of anything else I’ll add it…but okay so well, I said at the end of my last post that woman (*meaning in my argument as a generalization of “the feminine”) are ruining society.

There are lots of areas I’ve explored, but specifically lets talk about one big issue that just drives me crazy.

Here is one of these “new” truths that I slightly disagree with…

Women can handle more pain than men

This is a great place to start. This is now a widely accepted truth. Even most men I know, when asked (especially in front of women) will quickly nod or answer affirmatively…oh it is to laugh…

Okay I want to give you a second to get back on board. If you believe the above statement, I know you will want to immediately discount everything I say that follows as the ramblin’s of (at best) a chauvinistic ol bastard stuck in the past…well yea but that is beside the point…

Just promise if you disagree that you will read the following closely….

I am not saying pregnancy does not cause physical pain….

“No wonder he’s having such trouble Jim, looks like he’s got triplets!!”
“Well that’s tough for the young kid Mike, but he’s a competitor”
“He sure is Jim, why two seasons ago…”

I am saying if men could have babies some would have turned into a sporting event by now, with time, size and distance all coming equally into play…

Okay so there I go, making wild statements that detract from my argument.

Look I know its a commonly accepted generalization (now) that women can handle more pain than men, but facts do not support this.

So how has it gained such mass acceptance?

Well now that’s where it gets complicated.

Of course we have the “counter culture” establishment (dominated in part by the feminist movement).

This new truth is just a part of their “pogrom”, (but that’s fer another far more paranoid soundin post lol)…

There’s the American Woman as a whole, as a group, first many don’t subscribe to this theory, and even most who do, do so in numbers only…wait…What do I mean by that?

Okay well its easy to see that as a group, reading articles, watching popular movies, television, news, listening to popular girl music, Ga Ga etc, that woman like to all claim that they are now the “pain masters“, they have wrestled the title away from men (with only pregnancy as the standard fer judgement).

And it is often used as a comedy bit to make us all titter…when the big strong man can’t handle as much pain as the little woman…ha, ha, ha, 0h it is to laugh…and again reconfirms this “Nueth”(well alright hopefully no one’s thought that one up yet…if not I hereby coin that term “Nueth” meaning “new truth”)…

Okay so we can understand where this nueth has come from originally; a response by the now established counter culture to further undermine and thereby right the wrongs of the male dominated society.

Trust me these individuals knew/know that what they are saying is not true, but they feel the end will justify the means as it were, the end being a society(world) run by “the feminine”.

We can also understand why woman as a group all rush to embrace this nueth, (we’ll discuss women as individuals and their overall unhappiness with the success of this nueth near the end)…but why on earth would men succumb to such foo…oh yea that’s right…

credited to anonymous

Okay well you young guys, yer temporarily off the hook ’cause I mean, you don’t know no better, you were raised with this nueth as “The Truth” in big capitals, but us older guys well…

Okay there’s no pretty way to say it, we gave in ’cause it makes our lives easier (I know, I know you thought I was gonna say sex huh?). No I mean guys admit it, who cares if they say they can handle more pain than us right?

I mean its just one more thing they go on and on about that we only nod and pretend to agree with right?

Why? Cause to disagree results in a two hour discussion and possibly not gettin sex fer awhile(ya know it had to figure in somewhere)…

And here we get to the nut of it, fer me anyway, and excuse the obvious pun, but the blame lays on our shoulders, us men, fer lettin this thing get so outta control.

Maybe possibly so far out of whack that we will never be able to put things straight…

Okay so I of course have gotten off track, most of you aren’t even on board with the idea that even remotely possibly in general men can handle more pain than woman…despite thousands of years of evidence to the contrary…

I once shot a staple through my little finger at work, I pulled it out with a pair of pliers, wrapped it in duct tape and went back to work.

Every woman, that I have known, having burnt their finger will spend the rest of the night complaining about how much it hurts.

See this is not some crazy idea I have come up with as part of my dysfunction (my dysfunction makes it impossible fer me to swallow this b.s. that’s all).

This is how men and women have fulfilled their roles (I know ol fashioned and squaresville) for hundreds of years, up until only, of course, recently and here’s where we get into how it affects society fer the worse…

These young men we’re turning out, are more sensitive, weaker, more needy, more fragile than the women looking to marry them, and…well…how’s that workin out fer you ladies….?

I know, I know ya’ can’t win fer losin huh?

We men know how that is, we have to put up with, listen to ya, follow yer directions, hear about yer friends and coworkers just so we can maybe, possibly, if we play our cards right, get sex once in awhile.

Men, can whine about pain just as well women if they think it’s going to get them long term sex. Only they’re wrong, their women will never really respect them and always feel like “more of a man than he is”…

The end result men? She will boss you around, belittle you, and your dream of gentleness equals lots of sex folds in on itself under a ton of condescension…and why? In the long run guys all you know is that you are left, no pun intended, feeling unsatisfied.

Women, so yer guy gets a paper cut and comes to you in tears looking fer a band aid and sympathy (no lies now, be honest, and remember I listen to you talk about yer men folk at work lol)…it does not stir your loins does it? Not really? Does not make ya feel all warm and cuddly and protected (even though here again many so called modern feminist women want to deny this deep seated need of their own to be held)and so you also spend yer coupled life feeling unsatisfied. (which of course leads to all the belittling and mocking)

Where of course does that leave us, with just one more reason why so many marriages seem to end in (often times affair driven) divorces….everybody is acting against their nature.

Not only that but claiming this acting against nature is the true nature of man(sic) (long denied us by the white male power structure) and leaving everyone off feeling as if there is something missing, leavin all of us unsatisfied…

I say let’s put it straight….since cave man times until somewhere in the middle of the last century (how many thousands of years is that?) it has been commonly accepted fact that men can handle more pain than woman…why? Because in general, meaning more often than not, this is true.

Guy’s, this is just one of the ways I can help yer relationships…

She might not always act like it, but secretly she’ll be happier if you’ll be more caveman, less momma’s boy.

Satisfaction Guaranteed

Trust me on this one.

8 Responses to “Fun with Facts”

  1. John Haslett Says:

    How to win female friends and influence people. You are a hoot! I think there is one point you forgot or haven’t yet experienced. Men handle pain better because for our entire life we are required to bow, scrap, and humble ourselves before women just to get laid. Now that’s painful . . . .

    • Lol John-Yes, I love ’em, the world would not be where it is without them (Lil’ Mouse is angry at me fer this post, she’s adorably chastising me in the background) Oh and yes, that’s a pain I am quite familiar with…

  2. Okay, so I was all ready to get on here and be all “Really DYSU? Really? I mean, I’ll give you men are stronger–that’s a no brainer–but everybody knows women can handle more pain. I mean, it’s a proven fact, isn’t it? It’s incontrovertible. Not only is it common sense, but there’s research to back this up. Here, I’ve even dug up some studies for you to check out …”

    And then a funny thing happened. I couldn’t find any research to support this incontrovertible fact. There have, of course, been studies, but they all, in fact, seem to support YOUR argument, not mine. Some have yielded mixed results, indicating that women tolerate certain kinds of pain better than men, but for the most part, the score here is leaning towards the male end of the court.

    Having said that, the research completely contradicts my personal observations! I know, I know, I’m not exactly an objective observer, and anecdotal evidence isn’t really evidence at all, but I was honestly, genuinely shocked to find out that this adage is in fact a myth. I’ll give you two examples why:

    I recently had to go to the VA to get poked and jabbed with a bunch of needles in my back (an EMG). Before the procedure, I asked the doctor what to expect. She said it’s kind of like getting stung by a bunch of bees, repeatedly. Women tend to handle it better than men, and men with tattoos for some reason seem to have the worst tolerance for the procedure (her words, not mine!). That last bit about the tattoos she had no theories for, and we both agreed that it was kind of strange and unexpected, but she said that’s just usually how it goes. The big tattooed fellas are the biggest cry babies with the EMG. It was definitely not one of the more pleasant things I’ve experienced; however, it did rather pale in comparison to marching around for three years with stress fractures in both legs. Towards the end, when the doctor kept jabbing that stupid needle right into my spine (or so it felt like that’s where she was poking around), I grimaced a little bit. Nothing major–no tears or anything–but I winced enough that, as a soldier, I was a little embarrassed. There was another doctor in the room who told me how great I did when it was all over, but I was skeptical and thought maybe he was just trying to make me feel better. During my follow up visit, I indicated to the doctor who actually stabbed me with the needles that I felt a little bit like a wuss. She looked genuinely surprised and said, “You did great. Most of the men who have the procedure don’t even make it through the whole thing. We usually have to stop. Sometimes the guys cry.”

    Okay now, I know you probably think she was just trying to make me feel better, but I’m generally pretty skeptical and to the best of my ability to tell the difference, she appeared to be telling the truth. But I’ll give you another more objective example. When my husband, the medic, spent the night in the hospital for his kidney stones, he made sure to tell me multiple times that “they” say passing a kidney stone is as painful as giving birth. Having given birth, I doubted that, but I never passed a stone, so who was I to argue? All week, all I heard about was how painful passing a kidney stone is. You would think he did give birth. As it turns out, my mother has passed kidney stones, and gave birth to four children. So I asked her about the stones.

    “Oh yeah, it’s really painful,” she said. She told me all about how she was doubled over in pain, and my brother had to take her to the emergency room. “It’s not fun,” she said. So then I asked her if it was as bad as giving birth. Hysterical laughter followed.

    “Nothing’s as bad as giving birth,” she said.

    So there you have it. Apparently you have science on your side, so I can’t get too uppity on you, but I will say that based on my own personal observations, I thought it was pretty obvious women tolerate pain better than men! However, I am a grown up, and a women of science, so I can admit that I was apparently wrong (even though I’m still having a very hard time believing it! lol!)

    • SW-Thanks fer thoughtful reply. I do really appreciate it. Of course I often (almost always lol)talk in generalizations. So there are exceptions and opposites as it were. Also I will agree that women can handle extraordinary amounts of pain as well as men, in some cases possibly (science studies again) better.
      I will also give you that many(maybe even most lolsidc) men in today’s modern society have too easily abandoned one of the key aspects of their male heritage.
      See I believe men are suppose to be this way, though many have been overly gentled, tamed, and have yet to unlock this hidden potential that resides with in them.
      I also believe that we have not only genetically and evolutionarily been designed to handle more physical pain, but men, being genetically and evolutionarily designed to be less thoughtful(less sensitive) towards their fellow man means then that when we are hunting Mammoth as a group and Caveman Steve gets trampled(depending on the severity we might even laugh about it later as a group) None of us pauses from our determined actions as group. There by increasing our chances for success, tough fer the individual but overall good for the whole**tribe.
      I again am in no way saying that woman cannot do these things (some assuredly better than some men) or that, women should not be in active combat roles(a discussion I am sure we can have though lol) I am just saying that, in general, men are able(supposed to be and can if properly motivated) handle more pain than most women.
      It had to be this way given the nature of first, our evolutionary heritage (despite what modern day naturalists say 99.9% of the natural world functions under these laws) but our own historical evolution from ape to modern man has been on the bloody spear point of the masculine, and the gentle enveloping healing warmth of the feminine.
      So it is not just our ability to handle more pain, but to laugh more pain off. This is a secondary reason boys should be allowed naturally(as they genetically are programmed to do) to avoid their feelings.
      I have not talked about this issue yet. But I am not a supporter of boys learning to express themselves as females do…I know it sounds all good and nicey nice on the surface…but it makes them either wimps or bullies and there are two reasons for this.
      One a boys feelings are not always like a girls feelings, it may be impossible to explain but trust me, especially as a young boy my feelings are often…I wanna fuck something(yes I know I know modern day girls and all that, but when girls fantasize about fucking there still is sure a lot of holding and sensuous rubbing and feelings, men just wanna find a willing hole[it does sound terrible I know I’m one of ‘em I’m just as embarrassed…I’m just also honest about it) …or …I wanna punch something. These boys need to learn to control these feelings not express them. The other boys, the sensitive ones (who a portion would man up with appropriate guidance[I know firsthand]) well yea they are, on the genetic spectrum more feminine than masculine and easily fall into female behaviors (oops better be careful here)
      The other reason for this is our new habit of raising boys and girls the same. Just as we are different, we learn through discipline differently also.
      For a girl the “learning to behave” is best as a social process with lots of talking.
      For misbehaving boys, a good boot up the ass is what’s called for. Quick severe justice meted out. Behavior corrected move on with little or no talking. Talking gives a chance for explanation and or perceived validation of said behavior.
      I know I have went far afield now and have ranged slightly askew from our original topic. So let me come back, tying it in with the above by saying. This is why I have come to believe that girls and boys should be schooled separately. At least for the first few years. So that boys may learn to be proper men, accessing their male heritage without the aggression that comes with learning this process devoid of appropriate male guidance…(perhaps what all military service’s second societal function has been throughout human history)
      SW, I know this has been a long reply, but I wanted to reiterate how much I enjoy and appreciate a good reply. I feel I often make better arguments verbally because of the opportunity for back and forth helps me define and expound on my original premise, so if I get a good “challenge” reply I feel it gives me the chance do the same. So thank you, thank you, (feel free to challenge any of my other crazy assertions that are counter to today’s accepted thinking [yee haw])
      I have shot staples or nails through fingers and or hands and or feet, had more stitches than yer average baseball (once stitched my own hand while drunk on Cusano Rojo). And compared to the other men I hung around or worked with I was certainly not the toughest lol. (my ol roofing boss “Doidman” once shot a sixteen penny nail into his knee, pulled it out with a claw hammer and kept right on working[beats my staple through the finger story all to hell] he was one tough ol’ bastard)
      At this point I have had four knee surgeries (two on each, the last one a full replacement of the right) a left knee ready to go, five surgeries on my right wrist (ending in fusing the whole damn thing lol) a torn rotator cuff (left shoulder) a tear in my L5. I have broken my left arm, lost my three front teeth(bad cycling accident), and my sciatic nerve is causing my whole left side to buzz like a rusty chainsaw. Needless to say this is part of the dysfunction of the “Dysfunctional Unit” oh it is to laugh
      Okay bla, bla, bla, man I can go on and f ing on.
      Lastly, and as a fun way to close I will mention my ol buddies at “Jack Ass” a show dedicated to the fun and joy of inflicting pain, both to self and others…
      It isn’t just that this show is produced (etc) by and mostly watched by boys….it is that boys thought it up in the first place…
      A show, that upon first viewing, most girls will say, ‘well that’s just stupid’…
      And that is my point exactly.
      Go Men! 

      • Lol! Always a pleasure DYSU! Speaking of women in combat and long replies–did you see I finally responded to your question about that over on my stop loss post? That kind of fits in here with this thread, so I’m curious about your thoughts on that whole ramble as well. (if you haven’t seen it yet, my response was ridiculously long, so I’m sorry about that! I have trouble keeping things short!) I have more thoughts on your reply here, but I’ll have to come back–little pet monster is calling (as his name implies, my experience raising a little demon spawn–I mean BOY–confirms much of your point of view on girls vs. boys) …

  3. masondan Says:

    Good grief man, if I may complain, it bit too long winded for me. Nonetheless, I do like the fact that you’re fighting the lies are being spread. I commend you. Thanks for taking the time to comment on my blog!

    • Lol yea well I know. Even, as you are now aware, my replies can be long winded.
      Oh it is to laugh. I’m sure that’s what dissuade most folks from readin it.
      Amazingly enough I try to keep it short.
      But my brain chemicals prevent me from doing so.
      Or at least that’s what I keep tellin myself.
      Thanks fer not only stoppin by but commenting as well. I ‘preciate it.
      As i see you are openly and unabashedly Cristian I would love yer comments on some of my other posts such as “Does God Love a Ragamuffin” and/or “Sinners Sermon”.
      Anyway interested to see where yer goin with this book idea so I’ll keep stoppin by.
      God bless ya,

  4. Reblogged this on disfuctionalunit and commented:

    Another fun one from the archives of the O Dysu. Hoe ya’ enjoy it! Don’t be afraid to leave a comment cats n kittens

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Like Shakespeare but with more profanity

Thought Catalog

Thought Catalog is a digital youth culture magazine dedicated to your stories and ideas.

Musings From a Ragged Soul

Seeking happiness one step at a time


Science - Simplified


My journey - The good, bad and the ugly

Writings of a Mrs Mommy

Writings of a Mrs. Mommy is the Mommy blog to my Writings of a Mrs's blog. This blog will be more about my busy life with 8 children and the many adventures on how the Mrs. and Mr. manage it all! Humor, stress, love, food and photos will be the main focus. Alex and Jenn plus kids make TEN!


Fun Learning Resouces for Kids

The Benevolent Couch Potato

My life with popular fictitious characters

The Matt Walsh Blog

Absolute Truths (and alpaca grooming tips)


Books For Sale


Just words

Undefined Thoughts

Well, that came outta left field.....


If sarcasm and self deprecating humour were an Olympic event I'd definitely qualify.

Trent Lewin

Fiction, and other made-up stories

Why are you so AWESOME and I SUCK?!

I have struggled to be famous for over a decade. I have learned talent and hard-work are not key factors. This blog is dedicated to my pursuit in figuring out what it takes… to be famous.

%d bloggers like this: